that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
