More tranny stories later!
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Vodka?
Forever.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
