Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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