I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
