I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Randomize
