Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
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