rhymes with "ouble enetration"
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Randomize