Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Randomize
