the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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