I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
you never un-have a 4some
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
