I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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