i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
You can't motorboat a personality
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
