Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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