U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
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