it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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