break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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