physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
they're like a gay fantastic four
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Randomize