my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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