butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Randomize
