Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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