Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
You smell like a Billy Joel song
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
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