1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
