What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
that's an acceptable place to lick
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize
