Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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