So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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