I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Randomize
