i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
Randomize
