Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
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