Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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