My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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