you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
