That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
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