You're so nebulous sometimes
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
You're a waste of cheezeits
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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