In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I am available for nakedness
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
