brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
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