you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
