The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
