$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
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