Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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