Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize
