I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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