The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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