I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Randomize
