one two three fourrrrnication!
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Randomize
