Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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