this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
