how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
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