You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Randomize
