..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
