Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
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